So that's were I get it from

ooooooooooooooooooooh fuck Thanksgiving break is over and I did not work nearly enough on my research project.

Fact: You have to pay to recycle in Skagit County
Fact: They said no to the PUD and PSE is still there
Fact: Only county in Western Washington to vote predominantly Republican

Conclusion: Maybe my small town humbleness is all a shame behind the fake America I love.

So I was at my mom's and I'm pretty sure she wants to give me diabetes, not on purpose but shit when did I turn into such an adult so that I notice how much sugar is in things. Like cookies. Only when you make them do you notice they are like 60% sugar. She made and sent home with me: caramel corn, baklava, sninkerdoodles, pumpkin pie, pumpkin cheese cake, apple pie, and more I can't think of right now.

Conclusion: I'm gonna pull a Corbin. I'm not going to eat sugar for about a month or more. This will either be for Lent or the time period after winter break to my birthday February 25th. This could mean I will go mental. All my favorite things have sugar: pie, cereal, cake, cookies, kool-aide, root beer, mochas, pancakes, jam!!!

At least I don't need sugar in my coffee.

Runnig on Empty

It seems like everyone gets the mid-college OH SHIT what the FUCK feeling around this time.
I'm going to vent anyway.
I feel like shit physically and emotionally. My wisdom teeth are becoming a real problem, this means pain and money. I'm sick....again and I'm either paranoid or something might be wrong with me, like allergies or something. Finding that out would cost money. I work with kids so being sick means no work.

I also feel emotionally fucked up. Distant from friends, friends not being around or able to talk with, going separate ways. I cherish and look for stability. I don't know what to put my heart and love into anymore. I don't like me class. I am utterly unmotivated to do my work or do it well. I feel like I'm just going through the motions hoping something better will come of it. I'm trying to figure out what I want and what makes me happy just like everyone else, I used to have it figured out.
I feel lazy, inescapable as if I was not cut out to finish college. It's like I come here and pretend to be a college student, come home and report back in a bunch mush, and my family thinks I'm some well educated young man going places. I've worked alongside my Dad, I've seen the other side, being a working class schmo is physically draining and it's going away. The sad part is a probably can't even relay on what my Dad does as a Plan B.

A New Morning

Today was of those days that opens up like it should be in the opening of a movie or a chapter in a book.

I woke up, took a shower, had some cereal, Donovan went back to La Conner and I headed to school. The road felt prefect, like it should, wet autumn weather with the last of the leaves bursting in hues of orange, red, and yellow. I took a deep breath, I felt anew, a weight taken off my shoulders. Last night was the tipping point. Things feel fresh and open. I don't feel scared or ashamed or resentful. The keel is even and I'm ready for it.

I know what Obama says can seem corny or to good to be fulfilled. But I truly believe things are going to get better. If anything, I just can't wait to be proud of my president.

Learning to Ride

I'm in La Conner for the weekend, well actually Mount Vernon mostly. 

It was my Old Man's 50th birthday. 

Since I'm a poor college kid I was a cheap skate on his present. I learned how to ride a bike for his birthday present. For those of you who didn't know I never picked it up as kid. I was, and am still horrible at balancing, by middle school I was too embarrassed to learn, afraid somebody would see me and share my secret to the world. Then high school came and so did my drivers license. 

I decided not to be embarrassed about it and start telling people. My friends Claire and Tara helped me out last week and now I'm a biking madman. I can't get enough. I feel like I missed out on so much. 

Oh, I also voted. D down the line. Go Obama Go! And I voted YES on the death with dignity thing.